Justin Hand

Noah’s room is ready to go. Completely furnished with toys and goodies alike. I wanted to make his room a space theme. Shelley declared that it was “all me” so I went with it. The room starts off with a grassy border with a baby blue background to represent us here on Earth. As you move up on the wall, the sky turns to sky blue then sponged into a midnight blue top the top of the wall and on to the ceiling. We even bought a fan with a space ship on the blades and a globe painted like the earth. Mind you, this is not to nurture the hopes of an astronaut in the family but to promote the need to discover and excitement that not even the sky is the limit. Oh yeah, and also to get him on the sci-fi kick early on! According to Shelley, Noah is ready to arrive or so it seems as he keeps moving around and kicking about. I can only imagine he is thinking, “Let me outta here already!” I know i’m excited as hell to meet the little guy. The estimated arrival date of July 3rd is only 15 days away but seems like an eternity from now. Let me take a deep breath, and go back to rubbing Shelley’s belly and whispering to him.

Why did I wait so long to come here? Is it possible a single event could change one’s perspective forever? I’ve feel like I’ve been so lost, so alone. I find myself, in the one place i should have been looking the whole time. The city I live in has almost sucked this passion and motivation from me. I see now I must push on, and through to what it is I have aspired to do, nay, to be. Techno is my passion and its about time i let people know how I feel. If techno is this meaningful, can a DJ like Jeff Mills really save my life as another DJ? Yes. Just wait and see.

*side note* This post was made using my iPhone during an intense moment at the Mixworks Afterparty with Jeff Mills. I hope you can empathize with my emotional response to an amazing experience, using such few words

WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE by Maurice Sendak is truly a great book. Its one of the few books I remember from childhood, along with Shel Silverstein. It made such an impression, I would have to say it help set the stage for my monster fascination. The memories of ordering the choose your own adventure paperbacks from the book club come flooding back in to my head. Those years were so long ago but seem like yesterday.

To my amazement, I found out recently that the imaginary land Max creates and all the monsters within are becoming a movie adaptation. I just got through watching the trailer and I have to say, i’m pretty excited. It’s a chance to relive the childhood memories but in a new adventurous way. With the pending arrival of my new son, i’m feeling mushy these days and cant wait to share with him fun stories and books like this one. The movie premieres on October 16th so be on the look out.

Speaking of Noah, Shelley is off to the doctor again today and there will be an ultrasound. I’m very anxious to see the picture. I do admit the last one was a little creepy but hopefully this one will seem more human-ish. Man, it’s getting so close now to delivery day that I’m starting to freak out. We are nesting already and getting his room all prepared. We decided on a space theme. Even found Atari Space Invader wall clings, RAWK! Kid is going to have a cool ass room for sure. Hey guys, anyone wanna help paint?

“Dum dadadah dadumdumdum…GO TIGERS GO!!!!” Funny thing this morning…. I get up and get dressed kiss Shelley on the cheek as she seems so nestled up in bed. Head down stairs and fix my breakfast and pack the lunch bag for the day. I hear Shelley call out “Justin…..”, “yes dear?”, I reply. “Don’t forget, Tigers play today.” she mumbles. “I know baby, thank you.” I laughingly reply. Seems that even half dead she gathers enough strength to remind me about the game today. I think its great. I have to admit to you that I caught the tiger fever last year around conference time. I’m not a basketball fan and the game has never really even sparked interest for me but after seeing what happened last year with this city and how strangers hugged, people smiled at each other and races that would otherwise kill each other cheered in unison for the University of Memphis Tigers, well, I couldn’t deny them the respect and support they deserve. Here we are again, a year later with out hotshot players like Derrick Rose & Chris Douglas Roberts or even the defense of Joey Dorsey but arriving with a team just as eager and talented if not more honed to the game than before. Our free throws are must better, our defense is much strong and dare I say that our team is just as good if not better than last year. I have even heard a forecast for Memphis to win it all. I was there to see the starting line up and I’ll be here to watch them play out the last seconds of their final game. My heart is with them and I would love to see it happen this year. I’m not going to speak of what happened last year but sometimes being denied all but a simple taste of something so sweet only drives you harder to have it in your grasp. You can do it Tigers and I can say this without doubt, this city is behind you! The victory is yours, so take it!

The laughing Shark from Strange Wilderness!

Wow. I mean I’m just beside myself at what I’m looking at. It’s really happening and I’m going to have a son. I feel so strange about this. Its exciting, scary, fun and nerve-racking all at the same time.  The Ultrasound lady was pretty sure of herself and after spotting the “nuts and bolts” well, it’s pretty obvious but they say its not 100%. The lady was pretty confident and she said it was the one thing she COULD be sure of. I’m good with that. My son’s name is Noah Stafford Hand and to be honest, I can’t wait for him to arrive.  I feel like I have to prepare. Do I know all I need to know? What do I say and what do I do???  There are so many things that I’m unsure of and so many things I want to make sure to not forget but…  WHOA WHOA, Slow down there mister, the baby isn’t even here yet. Take a breath. RELAX…… Well, I can say its friggin’ cool. The lady was recording the baby’s movements as she was doing the ultrasound and right before my eyes, the baby opens it’s mouth, as you can see in the picture. She stops the recording and rewinds, then fast forwards and repeats. The next thing made me smile bigger than I think I have ever smiled before (well, other than seeing my wife on my wedding day). She made it look like the baby was talking, and she said in a baby like voice, “Hi mom and dad!”. It was great. I get chills just thinking about it. Well, thats F’in great. I’m turning in to a big ole’ sappy father. My friends are never going to let me live it down. I even considered posting this to its own space like noahhand(dot)com or something. I’ll probably wait till he’s born to start posting pictures and video of said sappy moments and leave this one for me.  Well, here’s looking at you kid!!!

I watched the inauguration today via CNN.com’s live stream. I still can’t seem to get the image out of my head… all those people. What a historic event to behold and such a hopeful time to be an American, to see the dawn of a new age that took place today. Our new president, Barack Obama, sworn in as the United States first president of African decent. Yesterday, my heart was heavy on the events of April 4th, 1968 in my hometown of Memphis. I wondered what would MLK say about the events of today and how would he feel about the progress we made as well as the journey we are still on. Today, I feel happy and hopeful. I think if MLK was still alive he would say something heart felt and historic, encouraging peace and unity in time of turmoil and declare a call to action for all Americans to invoke change. I think Obama did just that in his speech. I stopped by friends page, Binaryfx.org and noticed he had posted the full speech so I thought I too would share the words I hope will not only be remembered but words that should be taken to heart by every person born in this country. Today is a day I’m proud to be an American.

The full inaugural speech:

My fellow citizens: I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and co-operation he has shown throughout this transition.

Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because We the People have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.

So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.

These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land – a nagging fear that America’s decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America – they will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.

We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted – for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things – some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labour, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and travelled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and ploughed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.

Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.

This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions – that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.

For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act – not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology’s wonders to raise health care’s quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do.

Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions – who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.

What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them – that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works – whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public’s dollars will be held to account – to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day – because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control – and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favours only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our Gross Domestic Product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart – not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

As for our common defence, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience’s sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman, and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more.

Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort – even greater cooperation and understanding between nations. We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people, and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the spectre of a warming planet. We will not apologise for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus – and non-believers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society’s ills on the West – know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.

To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world’s resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honor them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment – a moment that will define a generation – it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the fire-fighter’s courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent’s willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends – hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism – these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility – a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.

This is the price and the promise of citizenship.

This is the source of our confidence – the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.

This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed – why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than sixty years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.

So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have travelled. In the year of America’s birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people: “Let it be told to the future world…that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive…that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet [it].”

America, in the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children’s children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God’s grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

Berlin, as you probably know is a bi-monthly minimal based event hosted by the guys in Nashville. If you have stopped here before then this should be no new-news for you. This Saturday they host their first BERLIN of the new year with special guest Dietrich Schoenemann. D should be no new-news as well, with a long list of accolades, his most notable one as a member of Prototype 909.  To save a long spiel about him, i’ll let you read up on the details to the left on the flyer.

There are several reasons I’m posting this flyer. One being that recently I’ve been feeling a bit stifled as a dj creatively due, in large, by the atmosphere here in the Memphis area. If you know anything about Memphis, it’s mainly a hip-hop and soul town. A strong house presence exists among my friends and family in the music industry here.  I myself enjoy plenty that the dance community offers in that realm however my heart yearns for much more than they can provide. In my opinion, Techno has become the redheaded stepchild of this city and it shows. The few of us here are scattered across the metro area and find it hard to get together except for the occasional low-tek late night places like Odessa and Nocturnal.  In the spirit of the mantra from Memphis’ very own TripleSix, “It’s hard out there for a Techno Pimp.”

Over the last 10 years, house & techno have made a shift in the same direction causing the birth of psuedo-fused genres like prog (trance fuses with house), electroclash ( 80’s & Electro meets techno), tech-house (house and techno fused) and minimal (techno subdued) …

***sidenote – these are generalizations and are no means a definitive definition***.

…these variations offer different appeal to an otherwise traditionally raw and aggressive techno “throw down” or groovy “hands in the air” house vibe.  As these areas develop and mutate, so do the crowds that follow them. I’ve seen shifts in what djs play and the people that they used to call a following moving and changes sides, if you will. Stay with me here, I’m about to tie all this together.

As a dj who has been forced to step out of my comfort zone and play anything and everything from top 40 to underground Memphis rap in order to make a semi-living, I’ve been trying to get back to my roots, leaving my club gigs and returning again to “the scene,” or so I hoped, to focus on TECHNO. The scene as once known is nothing like it used to be. I brought up the genre dilemma because I think with the change in styles & music tastes over the years along with the inbreeding of musical genres, I’m feeling lost.  Living in a place where house surrounds me, fortified by hip-hop and soul culture of the city I live in, I have arrived at a strange place in my life. I feel like I have stepped off the path where once, long ago, I forged a direction musically.  I’m now looking to get back on track but I find that there is no longer a path where there once used to be.

My internal musical struggle continues as anyone who has read my blog also knows. They say that when you have lost something and wish to find it, the best thing to do is go back to the beginning and retrace your  steps, so that’s what I’ll do. Vanilla Mike and myself have decided to head to Nashville to see Dietrich and the other guys from the Berlin crew for a dose of good techno-ish music inspiration.  Let’s see where this take me.

LINKS:
BERLIN NASHVILLE MYSPACE

BERLIN NASHVILLE BLOG

Looks like I am. Sometime Halloween night Shelley, being my trusted door person, started feeling a little nauseous and had to leave. MJ’s wife, Melissa, offered to take Shelley home. Shelley mentioned that she was curious to know what it felt like to have morning sickness and how would you know. This eventually turned in to a trip to Walgreens. Shortly later, basically the party had just ended and we were kind of bs’ing and drinking around the tables when Melissa comes up to me and gives me the news. Me being the idiot I am, think she is kidding. I must say here that if you know me, everyone kids me about getting pregnant and having babies. Im not your instant googoo-gaagaa kind of guy. Melissa dials up my girl and hands me the phone. I really was amazed but I was pretty intoxicated and didn’t remember the next morning until I got a call from MJ who was eating right across the street at Cafe Ole with his friend Chris. I remembered but even then was in denial and thought it was a joke. I spent most of the day cleaning up at dish until I was finally able to get in touch with Shelley at work around 4 I think.  She confirmed. Well, alot of time has past since Halloween. Turkey day is almost here and yesterday we finally got to see the doctor and get a medical confirmation and even an Ultrasound. I couldn’t believe it. I could even hear the little heartbeat, crazy. Well, I got the go ahead to let all my friends know, I’m going to be a daddy. WOW!

damn it.

The pictures to the wedding are up. Get with me if you’d like to view them.